Tips
for Parents
January's
Topic:
Minimizing
Power Struggles
The holidays have ended and parents are
tired. We have cooked, cleaned,
shopped, wrapped gifts, hosted holiday parties and played Santa.
Of course all the while working and doing laundry now and again.
As young children develop, they begin to
understand that they can make their own decisions.
Occasionally they make a power play at an inconvenient time.
While a power play can be frustrating for
the adult who is tired after the holiday, it is a healthy part of
children’s social/ emotional development.
Theses incidents help children develop a stronger sense of self and
the capability to set their own limits.
We adults need to react
appropriately. In many
instances, trying to force the child to do what he has said he will not do
escalates the situation into a full-blown power struggle.
Try offering assistance instead.
For example, you might say, “You can put on your socks by yourself
or I can help you this morning.”
Or offer choices.
“Ok, you don’t want to wear these socks today.
Would you rather wear blue or green ones?”
Power
plays are simply a part of growing up. When
handled by adults in a calm manner, they offer opportunities for children to
develop self-esteem and self-control.
Be able to self identify when you are
tired or stressed. Find ways to
manage such feelings to avoid power struggles with your child.
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